Monday, January 12, 2015

The Champagne of Toilet Papers.

After yesterday's more serious post I thought I'd take a more lighthearted approach today.

And, really, what is more lighthearted than a discussion of toilet paper? :)

After we went to the Y today, my mom told me she had something for me. I assumed it was just a textbook I ordered and had delivered to my parents' house. While she did have my textbook, she also had something else.

A 12-pack of Charmin.



Now, that may not sound like a big deal to most of you, but you have to understand that I have stated on multiple occasions that, "You really know you have arrived when you buy name-brand toilet paper." Because toilet paper ain't free, know what I'm saying?

The commoners among us choose to purchase the 1-ply, 6-roll pack at WalMart that costs somewhere in the neighborhood of $1.99. So what if you feel like you're wiping your bum with tree bark? Pain is temporary, but being able to pay your rent? Priceless.

But the Kathy Lafferres of the world refuse to allow their bum to touch anything that is not the 2-ply Charmin Ultra Soft. You know the stuff. It feels like pillows and is clearly made out of clouds.

The thing is, I really hope I don't get used to the champagne of toilet papers. Because after this pack is gone, it's back to reality. But I am going to enjoy it while it lasts.

And, as Mom said when she handed it to me, "At least you know someone was thinking about you."

I'll take it.

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