Guys ... it's been one of those days. One of those days when you feel like you are quite possibly the worst teacher on the face of the planet. One of those days when everything seems like it's going wrong. One of those days when you are 97% sure only one of your 6th graders is completely independently aware of what the subject of a sentence is, although all in-class evidence points to the contrary.
It all started today with a clock. I kid you not. Our school clocks, which are calibrated to show the same time, starting going haywire today. The second hands started going crazy, and all the times got messed up. This might not sound like a big deal to you, but let me tell you something -- it was seriously like entering The Twilight Zone. All it takes is one distraction, something minor like a second hand going crazy, and you're done for the day. Also, when it's 2:33 p.m., but your clock is showing 11:33 (a.m. or p.m., who knows?) it seriously makes people insane. It's like sleeping in a bedroom with no windows -- you have no idea what time it is!
Suffice it to say literally everything felt off today. Ev-er-ry-thing. Basically all the kids I taught after lunch were just not having it. Actually, none of the kids I taught today seemed to be having it. Do you ever feel like you are just talking to yourself? That is totally how today felt, although I was talking to myself about compound subjects and predicates, something I'd never do. As my dad would say, today I felt like all I was doing was rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic.
I am so grateful for a supportive principal who is always full of encouragement, and also encouraging coworkers. Our kindergarten teacher took some of her precious free time today to come down to my classroom and encourage me, and so did our principal. Our principal was kind and thoughtful enough to share some compliments she had heard, which really made my day. As always, I'd be lost without my middle school co-teacher Sarah, who reminded me today that 1. I'm not the worst teacher ever and 2. That God's grace and forgiveness are endless, and that that is pretty much the entire message of the Gospel. (Also Sarah speaks my language, which is wine. :) )
In conclusion (isn't that how you are NEVER supposed to end papers or speeches?) why is it always so easy to remember the negative things people say to or about you, but to not easily call to mind the kind things you hear about yourself? I know I'm not the only person that struggles with this issue.
You want to know something funny that happened today though? If you're my personal friend on Facebook then you may remember a couple weeks back when I posted about how I had just found out that "The Monsters are Due on Maple Street," an old epi of The Twilight Zone, is required reading in 7th grade. As might be evidenced from this post, I am a fan of the TZ (if I could have any job in the world, it would be Rod Serling's, nerd alert). Near the end of the day I happened to flip my 7th grade literature book open, and it just randomly happened to open to "The Monsters are Due on Maple Street." Perhaps a reminder to me that I really was looking forward to teaching and that I really am loving it a lot. Even if that's hard to remember on the hard days.
This post has absolutely no point whatsoever. :) Just thoughts! If you are a person, a teacher especially, who feels or has felt the same way -- solidarity, bro. I'm on your side.